“Love… a word that comes and goes, but few people really know, what it means to really LOVE somebody!” This is a line from Gospel Recording Artist Kirk Franklin’s song, “Love” and the words couldn’t be any more true than this.
You see, I come from a household where the words, “I love you” were not really spoken. It was one of those silent known things. Until this day, I still don’t understand it, but if you come from the same type of household, then you know exactly what I mean. This was/is the type of love that is filled more with actions than with words. So if mom shows up at your school to support you, that means she loves you. If dad comes out to a game, that means he loves you. However, I have to beg to differ. To me, that is more of an obligation. It doesn’t equate to love.
This type of love leads both males and females down a path of looking for love in all the wrong places. Because they aren’t affirmed on a regular, they seek someone who will affirm them, but for the wrong reasons. They don’t know any better, because hey, it is better than what they received at home. All the while they are really saying, “Please love me.” Love me without limits. Love me without stipulations. Love me because I am me and help me grow into a better me. Just please love me!
I was one of those who wasn’t affirmed growing up and therefore am just now realizing my worth. It lead me down a path of abuse, rape, low self-esteem, and having sex with who EVER told me I was beautiful. It also made me into the mother I am today, who affirms her children on a regular basis and tells them how much I love them. Am I perfect? NO! But daily I strive to be better than before. So I charge you with these simple steps:
1. Affirm those in your circle.
2. Don’t hold back on telling those you love that you love them.
3. Be an example to the next generation so they can continue to grow happy and healthy and know their value.